the FZ

the friend zone. my friend samantha calls it the death zone. I have come to realize that in the world/game of dating there is a small window of oppritunity between and girl and a guy to date before one or the other is put in the friend zone. I myself have both been put in the FZ ( many a times) and put a few in the FZ. it is a dangerous dance, the interaction before the FZ catigory is applicable to the relationship. I have come to realize that this window of oppritunity is very slim, like when you barely crack the bathroom window after a shower to let the steam out, that tiny. from what i have seen and observed, it is within the 1st few interactions in small hang out situations where the destination is decided by either the boy or the girl. friend zone or date zone. it sounds severe i know but from what i have seen this is true. One of my guy friends told me that there is no friend zone with men, merely a ladder, where a girl can climb up or down, up being a dating level down being a friend level. From what i have seen and felt tis not so. With in weeks of group hang outs a guy (or girl) will catagorize the other in their mind into or out of the friend zone. I think climbing out of the friend zone is a rarity as well. I dont think the friend zone is death really like sam says. Its not pure rejection to be put there. The guy or girl still values you somewhat enough to want to talk and intereact with you, just not in a romantic way. Now girls who secretly harbor false hope always just slowly damage themselves if they try to remain friends but still have romantic feelings for this boy. It is a slow painful torture as we kid ourselves with this false hope into thinking "someday this boy will come around and i will fly out of the friend zone like a bat out of hell." No dice. and i am sure it is the same way with guys as well. Actually i dont really know. When the day is done, and the dating dust settles, you gotta decide if its worth being in the friend zone at all, if thats no where ideally you'd like to be. I have learned in my experience that if you like a guy, and it isnt reciprocated, it isnt the best idea to be in the FZ. It is best to cut chords and see what else is out there. i have learned this through trial and error believe me. There comes a point in a girls world and soul when she has enough guy friends, and doesnt need anymore to add to her collection. I dare say it is worth the risk ladies to give the guy a green light, if he doesn't go for it, and jump on the oppritunity to date ya, then honey you gotta be honest with yourself. (and this works for boys too i'd assume) come to terms with the fact that he just isnt that into you. Embrace the learning oppritunity, put on your vest and stick out your chest and be off to the races again(newsies). If you are stuck in the FZ and dont want to be, then this other person hasnt realized the amazingness that is you, and most likely wont. So dust it off, remember you're worth it and let go. It can be a fun roller coaster ride the FZ, but sooner or later a girl wants to get off the kiddy train and head to space mountain.